It makes the man feel more masculine (like a provider, capable, active, dominant etc) and the woman more feminine (desired, desirable, "worth it", pampered, passive, submissive, etc).
This was definitely a part of the dynamic in my experiences with a particular dominant fellow. Of course, he also had a good bit more money at his disposal than I did. And in another aspect of what was going on, he was covering my expenses because I was providing help in his business during the same period as our fun time together (think working vacation, I was helping staff a vending booth at a very entertaining event) and it was part of my professional compensation. But a lot of it was done in the style of old-fashioned gendered expectations in a dating context and it reinforced the D/s aspect going on, and as it was done consciously it was a hell of a lot of fun. Play-acting!
On the other hand, when I was dating a decidedly genderqueer individual, we arrived at the decision that we were going with an ungendered host/guest arrangement -- whoever invited for a specific event (this was reinforced by geographical stuff, but not 100% congruent) would pay, so we could both have a chance to be the indulger and the indulged.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2011-11-14 07:54 pm (UTC)This was definitely a part of the dynamic in my experiences with a particular dominant fellow. Of course, he also had a good bit more money at his disposal than I did. And in another aspect of what was going on, he was covering my expenses because I was providing help in his business during the same period as our fun time together (think working vacation, I was helping staff a vending booth at a very entertaining event) and it was part of my professional compensation. But a lot of it was done in the style of old-fashioned gendered expectations in a dating context and it reinforced the D/s aspect going on, and as it was done consciously it was a hell of a lot of fun. Play-acting!
On the other hand, when I was dating a decidedly genderqueer individual, we arrived at the decision that we were going with an ungendered host/guest arrangement -- whoever invited for a specific event (this was reinforced by geographical stuff, but not 100% congruent) would pay, so we could both have a chance to be the indulger and the indulged.